Fears Again

Dear Lord,

Good morning. Early in the morning I was already feeling fearful and scared. Lord, Jeff and I are already talking about marriage but until now we have not yet talked about the issue of money.

I am scared Father. Scared that in the future he might be controlling our finances. I am scared that he might limit me with my salary and things for myself etc. I am scared of those things so I am having apprehensions if I would marry him or not.

But Lord I know my fears are unfounded. They are just creations of my crazy imagination. Forgive me. For I think subconsciously I might also be projecting towards him the reason why my parents have not yet met halfway in their relationship.Money is the problem between them.

I am just scared that I might be the one who would just work and pay the bills for us. I am scared of this too though he has a job also. But I know that his job does not pay that much though I am not knowledgeable about the exact figures. I am scared Father.

Father, please give me wisdom on this. I know he is the one I want to marry, the one You gave me but still I have my fears. These are coming from the fear about the issue of money. But I believe as Christians who want to get married this is something we have to give really consideration to for it might be an issue when we are already together.

Yes Lord. We will have premarital counseling. We will have that so we can be wiser and more grounded in You. Father God, thank You so much. Thank You for giving me wisdom. I know You will help us as we start our lives together. I know challenges will come along the way but we can get them through not by our own strength and knowledge but that wisdom, that discernment that only comes from You.

Thank You so much. Thank You very much. I will be more faithful to You. Amen.